to my peeps:

thanks for reading. this blog shall expire in 24 hours.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

!!!Ice Out!!!

Ice out is here and now. yea, it is good!. really not much goin on except gearin up for musky. I talked with my man Greg about musky and where to go and what to use. i got most the schizoo, just need the eye of the tiger. Boats are stacking up tight in the river. walters are biting and of course so are the catfish.. shit.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

DAMN THEE DARTH M.MATT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DAMN THEE, DAMN THEE, DAMN THEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How dare YOU put a HIT on me.!!!!!!!!!!! my son, I love you. cast away thine hatred and fall back weeping like a little girly man back into my arms.. when youre lookin down the barrel of a gun, what does it matter what species of fish do you work for???
Thats it, I'm headin to the FishLady for reinforcements!!! bitch! love, catfishjim

Wisco. update./ M.Matt's dead: widow now available

Well, the walleye are already running below Dubay dam now.. that about 2 weeks early. last year the bluegills didn't move into the sloughs until ice had already formed. global warming, or shifting weather cycles are forcing us fishermen to change up the "usual" times of the year to fish for certain varieties.
The 4th of July has always been when the carp spawn here. they frolick and jump in their grotesque orgy. fins,eggs,and sperm. Like some kind of disgusting breakfast omelette. I fondly call this exhibition "White Trash Sea World".. just think of shamu and namu as enormous Carp and ya get the picture.
It takes til @ june to start gettin some catfish action, here in midwest wisconsin.. I anticipate the warm weather and cold beer like a suicide bomber looks forward to all those virginal young boys:)
The boat landing at Galecke park is open and ready to launch. some gentleman has already put in yesterday. may feel a little early, but the bigger fish usually move earlier.. Try to make an attempt at your usual spot 2 weeks earlier than usual.. it'll probably be kinda cold, but suck it up. the fish are in the water, they don't feel the air....put on your long undies and don't be a sissy.
A few new fotos have been added. if you hadn't guessed, P. tony is richard simmons. we went to a close friend of ours wedding one dreaded helloween ago.......my friend died though..in a horrible, tragic, jelly-donut incident... so his fine woman is open to despoil and plunder.. look out julie. the men are coming!!! take it easy. catfish jim over and out!

Monday, March 19, 2007

Beware Darth M.matt!! Phat tony is now his Disciple!

For Catfishjim's Disciples Eyes Only!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Beware my catfish brethren of the Dark M.Matt. His power has grown far more than expected. My once strong brutha, Phat Tony , has fallen prey to my misled son. M.Matt. the once strong brown jedi, P.tony is now lost the the Pink side of the force. No man can save him now!! I must call upon The purple crusader, Prince!!!!!! leave thine vegas sanctity for now is the prophecy! Purple and pink make brown! Yes.
I call to all baitmasters and chumthrowers, lay down thine shafts of ugly stik-edness. together is our only hope. Let us converge to our fishspot of lore.... the legendary "Butthole". there is where we are safe from Darth M.Matt and his super- gay disciple. P.tony.
Trust no one, and tell no baitlady for none are safe. the time is now... the triad must survive!!

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Undercover brother from another mother/ Darth M.matt.

yes.!!! i have received a photo of a fisherman turned bait informant. this photo came at the expense of many fine men. You may recognize my friend phat tony on the left. the middle is who i call "Mr. Bait" and the man drinking deep from the flask is , yes. Milwaukeematt.
i know what you may think, but catfish, "Phat tony is yo best bud, whats M.matt doin with him?"" my only response is that i loved him too much. yes...i found M.matt an orphan. a baby left for naught in a 5 gallon bucket down by the river. I accepted this young babe and took him under my fin. i raised him and taught the subtle ways of bait presentation, the nuance of the circle hook, how to read the river bottom from the ripples in the water..

and yes, i taught him how to "feel" the fish. the same force that the brown and pink jedi share. without one you can't have the other... the lifeforce that binds us and makes the universe one. but M.matt's passion to catch monster catfish changed when he started to kill them and sell there flesh. he grew too powerful. and then he met the Fish Lady and fell under her slimy power. she offered him all the bait in the universe for his allegiance. and now, my son., i have dedicated my life to hunt you down and take back the secret of the fish. we will meet on a river bank someday. A day that i dread, for it is my fate to destroy what i love. the burden of catfishjim.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Wow. have been poisoned? .Cat whisperer...!! Happy St. Patrick's day

A bit of the irish in me, eh?? this goes out to all you fine drunk,irish,capitalist pigs. cheers. raise your drink high, and pour thine spirit deep in yer belly!!! kampaiii!!!!
well boys and girly-boys, i think the polii tried to poison me with polonium-23, or some type of power-scent additive. i have been laid out for the last 5 days with some type o mutagenic-virus... i can just barely get down a 12 pack before i pass out. Los mafioso may have put out a "trot-line" for my neck, or just a warning cast.. trust no one, hold your friends close, and enemies closer.. the Fish Lady "made" me a long time down the way, but a new Momma might be puttin the fish in the frying pan....
Gotta get back my he-man stamina, i dunno, but the crows have been circlin', but my Keepers of the Pillows; Sir Cinco, Sir Tigger, and the witch Sassy have been guarding me stoicly. just feed them and empty the litter of the cats and they stand fast.
yes, not only with the fish of cats do i talk , but also with fuzzy kitties. and sweater kittens. but it seems the cats just want to be pet mostly...
wow, the fish are hittin behind Rusty's now, so punch a hole and ice-fish, or punch a ho, and take her seat and order a bloody mary. nothing beats fishing at/near a bar...:)
wow. keep those comments comin!! And if ya have any news of any, let me know..Peace to my amish bitches!!!!!

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

who will be an april foo ???

That's right. a fool. unless your Mr.T, and then i pity you. Of course April 1st is the day "los bastardos", the DNR, use to catch unwary fisherpeople. yes. look out as that is the day your old fishing license expires. so make haste to 2 get a new license for 2008. the DNR may make an exception if you have a spare benjamin, but probably not. My friend from boulder junction got busted once and he got a cavity search.. he requested it though. i got popped by the dnr "crick dicks" two years ago with a crappy walleye fisherman. yet another reason not to trust another fisherman (unless a carp or catfisherman). it seems this walleye dude needed food and wanted to keep the fish because they are "good-eatin". In the process of netting one of these monolithic toob-sox, i bloodied my thumb on the back of the engine. so i started chugging beer as it was my only available pain-killer. it helped ease the pain until "they" wanted to see what "we" had caught. i pleaded my case as i am a catfisherman and would not want to keep such puny fish except for bait. long story short, we split the fine. an expensive half inch.
moral of the story: only fish for species that do not warrant to be measured. its a ploy for the dnr to bust you with a fine more suitable for musky fishermen.
!!!!!Watch out!!! be aware ice-catfishermen.....the ice is still about 12 inches, and then some, on some of the lakes, but the river is sketchy...super sketchy. Be safe and practice the buddy system. if fishing alone, please tell someone your "super-secret spot" as if you don't return soon, they know where to look.. serious, i always let someone know where i go. don't be that guy and have to cut off your arm with a dull swiss army knife..... later ..catfish

Monday, March 12, 2007

Just another manic monday.

this is first day adjusting to the new time schedule. it sux. I need my coffee like i like my men, hot and in a cup. Gonna punch a few holes thru the ice today before work, but where??? where is my un-employed fishin carp-buddy when i need one?? oh yeah, tony kicked him out of his house.
well, time to look into my crystal ball and ask, "what would Chuck do?" Kick ya in the head with a deadly roundhouse jump kick., that's what he'd do!! shit, i hate ice fishing anyways.
catfish jim has packed on a few extra pounds this winter by sampling too much of his experimental stank bait.. but you gotta know what it tastes like to know if the fish'll like it. that reminds me of a stink bait recipe i posted a couple years ago on "april fool's day" that include fresh, hot, steaming dog poo. it took a couple days before the webdude in charge must've gotta complaint. HEY, if you're not ready to step up to the plate and use crap to hit a home run, go shine my shoes! Catfish love shit!!! that's why i love them and they love me.. "exactly 32 centimeters" well. time to gear up, take care all ye brethren and remember, "you're only as good as the bait your fishin with." Sucker!! catfish jim out....

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Phat flatheads in F.i.b.land

hello. a recent huge catfish was slammed in central illinoise. powerton lake in Pekin. near peoria.. as we all remember, pekin is one place that distills Absolut vodka. go figure.. this powerton lake is a warm water discharge lake,(similar to lake columbia(which currently holds the record for producing the worlds largest piranha) in our wisconsin.. this lake has produced yet another 70+ flat head catfish... the flatheads are in the wisconsin now too.. if ya didn't know yet. which you probably didn't because your not named catfish jim. so there. especially you jeff krolski. more about flatheads in the wisco later.....

Crap. its daylight savings day.

well, its warm and sunny today. that in between time. ice fishin' is kinda hinky, river too cold. i think i may fish in the wps fountain today. or better yet, lake pacawau? either way. If any of my catfish disciples have not seen 'Borat" , i'd recommend watching it. the ending is the best, other than the nude wrestling.
so. back to fishin.. this in-between-time is a great opportunity to refill old fishing line with new line, disassemble those reels and re "lube" the gears. this will maintain your gear, ensuring years of flawless performance.
in other news. i have discovered a new splinter cell of bait mongers. it is an area i never suspected. i found home base awhile ago, and even withdrew some stunning inf0rmation from past bait agents..... the bait mafia is not one but many... there has been a secret struggle for bait distribution for years, with untold bait deaths. sleepin with the fish lady, if ya know what i mean, and god i hope you don't know what i mean. the head fish lady of Ricky's bait was whacked last year. this matriarchy was in turmoil after her passing and now is being ran by a man.!! shit. this dude is toast. bait doesn't get moved by guys and we all now that. Cliff's bait 24-7 is ripe for the picking. if not for the well-trained dobberman pincers, she'd be chum by now.... i must infiltrate this family, for bait runs this state. and all fishermen, garbagemen, potatoe farmers, politicians,..know we are all under the thumb of the bait mafia..!!!! i will be off line for awhile, must head to Polonia to hide out. stay posted my brothers...except you erik. you damn musky whore.!

Saturday, March 10, 2007

nothing sux like a hoover(or milwaukee matt)

the notorious hoover dam. yes. large catfish are said to be below this dam. Catfish large enough to swallow two full-grown men in one gulp. it was reported that a diver doing repair work on the dam, burst from the water so terrified from the monolithic catfish that his hair had turned white. one man, i was told, fished for these mammoths with a car winch, and hand-forged steel hooks. my guess is dynamite would prove effective. but i don't know with the dam and water and all if they'd like someone throwing dynamite in the water at the base of the hoover dam.

new world order

oh yeah. i will be musky fishin' this year. much to my chagrin. i will be fishin what i think is the highest concentwashun of musky in the wisco. river. i won't talk openly though about it as my name is catfish.

Sunday, March 4, 2007

my first bolg entry

blog,bolg,..whatever. yep, its true.....i'm here too in cyber-blog-land. No way to avoid my idle ramblings and ideas and thoughts.... i am inspired to do this by my carpfish buddy. jeffers. www.inbackofbeyond.blogspot.com He too may teach you his carpy way. more to come of course.. stories of me and sassytatas(my fembot fishin buddy), Phat tony (my other Phatter fishin buddy) , plus polish-mafia and bait-mafia updates... have a cold one and get ready to ride the catfish wave..... love. jim